Pabulumary Ponderings

• The above is an Asian dish of beetles and a sauce.




• I would starve to death first, which would be true for most westerners and even a lot of Asians. When they show people from other countries eating gastronomic nightmares such as this picture them being like calf fries in the US or Marmite in England ; )- yes, a lot of people eat them but, a whole lot more don't.




• PS forget the notion of A person will eat anything if they're hungry- it's not true- people have always died from starvation or related diseases in confinement or survival environments because they won't eat unpalatable things while others around them survive. It would be more true to say people will eat a lot of things they never thought they would but, that's kind of a boring truism.




• I get known (which I hate) at work or other circles for liking to try strange types of foods. I also get known for being able to handle disgusting tasks without tossing my cookies (I just take the gross thing and think of the few good memories I have of my marriage wad them up together into a little ball and push them down into a place where I can never touch them again and forget about them.)




• Man, that was a long parenthetical thought.




• Anyway, this leads to Vietnamese friends bringing pickled embryonic duck eggs to work for me to try, redneck friends and family members offering me fried testicles, Mexican friends offering stews made of guts and offers to have dinner with African families that there is no telling what you're eating AND where on earth would you get that in America anyway?




• Although, I love chorizo and yes, I know what it's made of.




• I try new things that seem appealing to me- not things that will pose a challenge getting past my gag reflex.

• The men of The Corp Of Discovery (otherwise erroneously known as The Lewis And Clark Expedition) ate 9 pounds of meat per man per day (I think that's about half a stone marmi.)

• Ughh




• Ever wonder why all (it seems) Chinese meat dishes are spicy, sweet, heavily sauced, smoked or otherwise crazily flavorful? It's because for most of their history the average person got by on very small amounts so it was a big deal when they had it to prepare. Since their industrial revolution I don't know if that has changed though.

• Also oddly (to me) I think I get known for eating a lot. This is really strange since I normally only eat one meal and then some kind of snack per day. Maybe the one meal seems large-ish and if people have lunch with me they assume I eat that way three times a day.

• Saw a truism/challenge the other day that I will never forget: At least once in your life you should kill, prepare, cook and eat your own food.

Lyrically Speaking

Send The Pain Below"

I liked having hurt,

So send the pain below where I need it,

You used to beg me to take care of things,

And smile at the thought of me failing.

But long before, having hurt,

I'd send the pain below,

I'd send the pain below.

Much like suffocating,

Much like suffocating,

Much like suffocating,

(I'd send the pain below...)

Much like suffocating,

(I'd send the pain below...)

You used to run me away,

All while laughing.

Then cry about that fact, 'til I returned.

But long before, having hurt,

I'd send the pain below,

I'd send the pain below.

Much like suffocating,

Much like suffocating,

Much like suffocating,

(I'd send the pain below...)

Much like suffocating,

(I'd send the pain below...)

Much like suffocating.

I can't feel my chest,

Need more,

drop down,

Closing in.

I can't feel my chest,

Drop down.

I liked, having hurt.

So send the pain below,

So send the pain below,

(Much like suffocating)

[I liked]So send the pain below,

(Much like suffocating)

[Having hurt]

So send the pain below,

(Much like suffocating)

So send the pain below,

(Much like suffocating)

So send the pain below.

A rawking song from one of my faves-chevelle

Wednesdays Digressions

See, clean, plentiful water IS sexy and way more interesting than hi speed rail, space travel and other daydreamy stuff!

• Bea Arthur has died at 86 and Farrah Fawcett's publicist has been denying for weeks she is at deaths door.
• Even the legends don't live forever.
• Where were you when Dana Plato died?
• I was in my little house in the country. The glass fell from my hand. I began to weep.
• Well the first sentence is true.
• Foi Gras has been banned in California in legislation that takes effect 2012. I don't know which is more ridiculous- eating or banning the stuff. Yes, I know what it is and how it's made.
• Another thing that gets me: animals are still being killed and in some cases pushed to extinction for their body parts magical or supposed medicinal value- absolutely ridiculous. Good grief- it's 2009 AD not BC.
• Susan Boyles has shaved her mustache.
• My children were on their grandparents ranch for the weekend. Good for us all I know but, I missed them.
• They were riding horses about as soon as they walked.
• Ask them what they did this weekend and they will say,"Worked cattle with my grandad."
• You'll picture them sitting on a fence rail or in a pickup for a little while watching cows walk by as they're processed.
• They de-horn and castrate bulls, give vaccinations and brand all the animals.
• My teenage son came in covered in blood, mud, doo-doo and animal hair. He saved a horn to mount on a knife blade.
• He stunk to high heaven.
• So proud.
• The show Bones is always good and they often knock an episode out of the park.
• The show Fringe is usually OK but, they can also kill- occasionally.
• The shows Arrested Development and The Office? Just always very good- every episode, never tumultuous though.
• We are going the other way in proposed infrastructure development. As I've said in the past- bridges are falling into rivers with people on them, entire regions were without water because of a drought recently, our electrical grid can't compete with anything more than a perfect spring day without threatening to collapse but, we're talking about going to the moon and Mars?
• Crazy
• Insane
• Irresponsible
• Now the President is going to push for a fast tracked multi gazillion, patrillion, quadrillion dollar high speed coast to coast rail system? The same system that I can assure you will be a government subsidized nightmare from groundbreaking- 'til death do us part.
• Let's make sure we have drinking water first. Gigantic reservoirs of the stuff that break multiple records in multiple categories of The Guinness Book, that can be seen from space, that our children and grandchildren will play in, bathe with, drink and sell to countries that didn't have the foresight to take care of something so basic and get fantastically rich. Is that too much to ask? Or just not sexy enough?

Mamas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Cowboys...

Or maybe that should be: Don't Let Your Cowboys Grow Up To Be Babies?

Ann Coulter Action Figure

Auction Fever

From the Tarrant County estray animal auction www.renebates.com. Go bid on these guys- probably had a rough time of it in their lives so far since we learned of their existence through a government auction and deserve a good home. The donkeys are named Cheech and Chong. The emu I don't know its name but, I would name it Emily. I would bid on them myself but, I would use spray dye on the donkeys to make them look like zebras and Emilies name would stay even if it was found to be a male- and none of this sounds good for an animals mental health.

Mondays Missives

• Saw a guy the other day who had a Third Reich symbol tattooed on his neck.


• It was done backwards.


• Idiot
• The swine flu pandemic? As usual in these sensational stories we need some perspective. It started in Mexico and is believed to have killed 80 people and infected 1500. Mexico is a third world country with a population of over 100 million people. There are over 300 million people in the US and 20 cases have been identified. Most of the people who have and will die are the compromised- elderly, sick with other debilitating diseases etc. There will not be carts being drug through US streets with a guy clanging a gong and shouting,"Bring out your dead" over and over while most of those lucky enough to still be alive are too weakened to drag their dead children out to the cart anyway.
• 20,000+ people are killed every year in the US by influenza viruses. Just not scary sounding ones like the dreaded Swine Flu- they are normally referred to as "The common flu virus".
• At this time I have 284 draft posts built up and 170 scheduled to publish.


• They have caught multiple people in Australia for setting the wildfires that have killed nearly 200 people. In the US it's often reported the inevitable wildfires in California are set by part time firefighters to insure they get work for the season. I can understand (or at least accept) a lot of things I don't agree with but, my God, how could a person do that? Also, I bet it happens way more than we'll ever know.


• Another component to wildfire stories here and abroad is environmental policies are often to blame because people can't legally clear fire hazards causing excessive fuel.


• Still know only one person personally who is unemployed.
• Scratch that- she is working now.


• The last lot in my development must have sold- I noticed fresh flagging from the surveyors.


• I could have bought it for a highly reasonable offer susceptible 16,000 dollars when I moved here.
• The developer was in jail at the time.


• Should have robbed a bank.


• The last big attempt at pushing a diesel powered car in our country was in the 80s and it was a dismal failure yet diesel trucks continue to be popular and highly desired even among people you might not think of as needing one. Volkswagen's diesel Jetta is reliable, low emissions, quiet, comfortable, powerful and it gets nearly as good of mileage as a Prius with more interior room yet, people who could not personally remember the Oldsmobile diesel tuna boats from back in the day could not be forced into a Jetta at gunpoint because of the bad connotation of a diesel passenger car.


• The other night I was changing the baby when I picked up a tube of what I thought was his butt cream- luckily for him I looked at it close enough to catch the label: Deep Heating Muscle Rub.


• Something tells me I would have been explaining that one to multiple government authorities and mental health providers for years.


• A few night ago I was stretching my back after doing my exercises. While on all fours on the living room floor the baby came up beside me lifted my pants up at the waist in the back, looked down them and said,"Ewww- poopy" and then busted out laughing.


• Maybe he's going to be a comedian.


• Some day I would like to meet some one whose blogs we've mutually followed not only to meet someone new which is always good on its own but, just to see what it would be like.


• Apple slices and caramel dip are together again in my house- natures most perfect foods.
• Recently a nurse from another agency made a very overt sexual advance toward me- very flattering, exciting and a little unnerving.
• She took being forward to a whole new level.

What Would I Say To One Of My Patients

were they able to come back whole and healthy and be able to visit with me?

My Lord, girl we laughed a lot didn't we? I told you then and would still say the same, "You are nuts- in a good way though" of course. I appreciated the fact even you saw the humor in your Elvis shrine. I saw more bad, old movies in those 9 night shifts than I've seen in my whole life and enjoyed every one of them. Yes, you were "somethin' back in the day" and still very pretty it's just that cancer and the associated treatments has never been known for being friendly toward a persons looks. Sounds trite and overused I know but, your beauty came from the inside anyway.

Your hubby loved you like no other and I doubt he would have fared well without your daughter but, thankfully they did have each other after you left.

Will never forget how embarrassed you were to get off the oxygen so hubby could help you partake of the herb the friend brought to help your pain. I didn't know what else to do either without knocking you completely out. I was just glad it helped your suffering but, to be so worried about my feelings and what I thought of you at a time like that? I was more floored by that than anything.

Usually when I get attached to a patient I want to be there when they die. I was relieved though I was off when you died, although I'm also sad I wasn't there for you and your family. I don't think I would have held it together too well and I need that control to be able to do my job.

I will never forget you and think about you often- my friend. Thank you for being my friend.

From The Field

click to enlargenate AND have one more reason to not swim in the Trinity River.
These exclusive images of an elusive giant alligator gar sunning on the surface of the Trinity River were captured by cell phone from an undisclosed downtown Fort Worth TX hi rise office building. Witnesses describe the beast as a "monster" and "at least six feet long". Back to you Barry.

Fridays Dispatch- The Early Edition

• My feet are cold- cannot stand that, I'm wearing fuzzy house shoes. I never wear house shoes- fuzzy or otherwise. They were given to my son for Christmas and he outgrew them before he wore them I think.
• He wears size 14 shoes and is not nearly through growing.
• I'm listening to a live recording of Cheap Tricks I Want You To Want Me and singing along. Things can't be all that bad and even if/when they are- try it, I promise it will make it all a little better.
• I've said it before, I'll say it again,"We may have gotten a lot of things wrong in the 80s and early 90s- the music was not one of them."
• Surrender is starting- even better (nearly).
• In my neighborhood it's nothing for my neighbors to check their mail or get something out of their cars in PJs, robes or nightgowns etc.
• Nearly everyone has a 4 wheeler, go kart or golf cart etc. And it seems a relatively large number ride bicycles and walk as families. The long-ish road, friendly neighbors, isolated feel, one acre lots and the pond at the end of the lane has something to do with that I think.
• One of my neighbors used to have parties and they would drag shotguns out and shoot clay birds in their front yard.
• My next door neighbor busts rounds off into his firewood stack occasionally.
• Actually nice that people can exercise their rights and freedoms that openly but, it wasn't very good for me when I first returned from Iraq.
• No, not good.
• The people across the streets dog would come to my house when she smelled breakfast cooking, nose the door open and come in and sit down and wait for her share.
• What are neighbors for I guess?
• No, not a trailer park- average house value would be about 200,000 dollars.
• Before the bubble burst.
• I can be in a sound, exhausted sleep and if the baby wakes up and says,"Daddy" I'm awake and alert and going to him.
• Yes, that's usually the first thing he says when he awakens- humbling, satisfying, terrifying, fulfilling...

America The Humorous

Best Of Craigslist

..I am sorry - m4w Originally Posted: Sun, 1 Feb 22:11 CST
Dear Mr. Scammer..I am sorry - m4w
Date: 2009-02-01, 10:11PM CST
Dear Mr. Scammer I owe you a few apologies:
• I am sorry for responding and saying sure I am happy to engage in a bizarre business deal with you knowing full well it isn’t real.
• I am sorry you wasted time to print a horrible fake check.
• I am sorry you spent $4.90 UPS’ing it to me overnight.
• I am sorry for taking a few days to get back to you after I got the check and ask you for your phone number which you can’t give me. I knew that and still I emailed you for the phone number.
• I am sorry that I lied to you and said I could not find a western union office near me, making you look them up, emailing me a list and me telling you those two liquor stores are shut down.
• I am sorry that I lied to you about getting pissed at the western union office because they wanted $1.75 to cut a check and that I said that’s robbery and left in a huff. The truth is I never went there in the first place. Sorry for wasting your time that day.
• I’m sorry I lied the next day after you threaten to call the FBI and local police on me because I cashed your check and would not pay you. I knew you would not, but I wrote you an email begging you not to call the police and that I would pay you tomorrow after I cashed the check.
• I’m sorry that I lied the next day and said the western union office girl was rude to me so I left in anger, again delaying your money by another day.
• Im sorry I lied about sending the money to western union in your name vs the shipper so you could not pick it up. I realize this cost you a day or so.
• I am really sorry that I lied and said that the money order was at your western union, but off by 1 zip code making you drive 30 minutes to find out I am a liar.
• Your last email to me was justified. Obviously from your language you were pissed. The fact that as you "YELLED” and your grasp of the English language seemed to fade away like my Mom’s when she is livid showed me what a bad person I am.
• Your phone call from Africa? was upsetting because as you were trying to explain to me how to go down to western union and pay the $1.75 and you would pick up the fee, I realized how frustrated you were getting. I also lied about being hard of hearing and asking you to yell. Sorry. All in all, I am sorry for sucking up your bandwidth. I realize that my actions probably sucked up 6-10 hours of your time and kept you from fleecing some gullible person in America. Please forgive me. Go ahead and send me another forged check and I will send you my cash to your shipper. Please try me again. Even though I lied you to about 15 times I won’t do it again. Your friendly computer person.
Location: creve coeur
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interestsPostingID: 1017058283

Steve Wrightism

"I wrote a song, but I can't read music so I don't know what it is. Every once in a while I'll be listening to the radio and I say, "I think I might have written that."

More Mondays Missives

• Just finished mowing the yard the second time this year! Good grief.


• I did it in my underwear- there's one I can cross off my list.


• It wasn't that big of a deal really I was on a lawn tractor and wearing a shirt- it wasn't like I was wearing whitey tighties a smile and nothing else while pushing an antique reel mower.


• Don't know why I did that- seemed like a good idea at the time. I think my inner child is a 12 year old thug who plays too many video games, watches Jackass and dares me me to do dumb things.


• He may also sniff glue.


• The swallows have won the right to raise their young on my porch again by wearing me down and having their nest completed before I can tear it down. Need to put a web cam up there.


• If you can't beat 'em...


• Would like to band the young and see if they come back.

Mondays Missives

• A little over half of the US total population supposedly voted in the 2008 election. You would have a tough time convincing me that really happened.
• Looked at a blog earlier that mentioned the mobile Vietnam memorial and showed a picture of the writers uncles name. I looked it up on the website- it was strange to think about her little daughter who was named after him, the fact he was from only about 30 miles from where I grew up and then read the cold, nearly clinical assessment of his death: Death by hostile action. multiple fragmentation wounds. body recovered.
• The first time I saw a case of body bags it stopped me in my tracks: Pouch, Human Remains 10 ea.
• I don't like being too comfortable for too long and if the weather is extreme outside I feel the need to get out and be active in it if I feel like I've been too sheltered indoors or something.
• I read a Guinness Book of records last night for the first time in forever.
• That gives me an an idea!...
• An honest question: although I understand Hitler was responsible for the deaths of up to 50 million people because of WWII he is mostly reviled for for the Holocaust which killed at least 6 million people. His name personifies evil like no other. Stalin was responsible for the deaths of at least 20 million of his own people following the war. People in Russia still revere him and others don't seem to realise how evil he was in comparison. Why? Was it the perceived worth of the groups of people involved? Perceived intent? He never had a war crimes trial or died during the atrocities?
• Tina Fey- one of the hottest non hot women in show business.
• Saw a group of buzzards dining on an armadillo on the side of the road yesterday morning. It was lying on its back all four feet straight up in the air like a dead cartoon animal and the buzzards were taking turns sticking their heads into its shell to get a bite of guts.
• Breakfast on the half-shell.

Missives: Special Bonus Edition

Our ride for the zombie apocalypse- you get shotgun

• In the news: "Man bites off end of own penis. Police found him after receiving an anonymous tip"




• If I'm lyin' I'm dying- that's what it said.




• My present patient played golf well into her 80s.




• There's a line to a song that says," Cinnamon and sugary and softly spoken lies- you'll never know just how you look in other peoples eyes." The last part is so true and such a shame sometimes because the world might be a better place if we could every once in a while.




• The singers dad was MR. Peppermint.




• Zombie movies are making a big comeback and I couldn't be happier.




• I'm telling you- you'll be glad to know me when Hell is full and the dead walk the earth and I know exactly what to do.




• I could never have anything to do with a woman who wears open toe shoes and hose.

A Secret Message:

Thanks, that was very nice

It took a while but, I think I found the right flower for you

My Mood Music

Lyrics to Gary Jules Mad World. Look up the video on youtube very cool.

"Mad World"
All around me are familiar faces Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for their daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow
And I find it kinda funnyI find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It's a very, very mad world mad world
Children waiting for the day they feel good Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
And I feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me
And I find it kinda funny I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you I find it hard to take When people run in circles It's a very, very mad world ... mad world
Enlarging your world
Mad world

Brittania Missives

• A recent commenter on here made me start thinking about jolly old England.



• There may be example of a parent country and former colony becoming as good allies as we but, I'm not aware of it. When the world devolves into a bloodbath quest for survival of civilization, whether it's against zombies or religious nuts- we'll be standing there shoulder to shoulder.



• A funny thing historians have sometimes pointed out is how useless/senseless the War of 1812 was- they missed the whole point: it took that to convince the King the US really was for better or worse independent- get over it. Until that war England thought the result of the Revolution was basically a fluke. I think our relations would have solidified over the years and we would have become allies but, I think it really was necessary to keep the war for indepence from being an unresolved sore spot from the Crown on down to the general population.



• There's one thing that surprised me I learned fairly recently- in the years leading up to the Revolution even run of the mill Brits but, especially those in higher English society not just the Empires leadership were hot for the colonials to be put in their place.



• What do English schoolchildren call the Revolution?



• A woman can be a pig or a man an ugly slob but, put an English accent on them? Whoa baby, the average American can't get enough of them. Some of the ones I know continue to play off their accents and lay it on thick even after being here for 20-30 years.



• Had a friend once who could work the girls with an English (or sometimes Australian) accent like nothing you've ever seen before.



• He was born in Fort Worth Texas.



• Can name plenty of contributions of English culture to the world but, can't name a single thing about their tastes that appeals to me and that I have or would apply to my life.



• Jaguar cars in the right models and years are pretty awesome though and I do have an open mind about the culture in general.



• Need to learn more though and would love to visit. Had a friend years ago from Hampshire and he hung out with me in Texas and I was supposed to go visit him but, you know how those things go...



• At least I'm pretty sure it was Hampshire: he called it Hamps or Hants? when he would get on a roll telling stories about home.



• He went to school in high school to be a groundsmen on golf courses. One day we were out on my motorcycle and I took him out to look at a rich guys private zoo in Decatur TX. We turned near the golf course he said," STOP the bike, stop stop stop!" I obliged and he took off at a dead run toward the groundskeeper (I'll never forget the look on the guys face as he raised the tool he was holding in preparatory self defense) who was at the hole closest to the road and started talking. When he came back he gave me a full rundown of the differences and similarities of our two systems of sod maintenance- very interesting.



• Not



• We had pancakes one morning. Bleary eyed he said,"Is it pancake day?" Evidently they have a pancake day over there. I said,"Dude, EVERY day is pancake day here!"


• Another memory of Adam- 100mph on my KZ1000 motorcycle and him pounding me on the back shouting,"Woo Hoo- Unbelievable. This is brilliant, it's bloody brilliant!"



• Allow me a brief heresy: not a great Beatles fan.



• Still remember exactly what I was doing and where I was when I first heard the Sex Pistols though.



• I love Brit coms although I plain, flat do not understand Chef although I tried when it first came out. All he did was scream at, berate and belittle his staff and others- didn't seem funny. I'm pretty sure it was meant to release some social tensions for guilty whites and self conscious blacks because he was black and raged constantly against a largely white cast of characters but, I'm not sure.



• Red Dwarf, Black Adder, Waiting For God, Fawlty Towers = genius.



• The more shaky the science or historical accuracy of an educational program- the more like they are to use an English narrator.



• That country will essentially be the first modern, civilised nation to fall to Islam and there is nothing that can (or will?) be done to prevent that.


• "The British version of the product is a sticky, dark brown paste with a distinctive, powerful flavour, which is extremely salty and savoury with umami qualities, somewhat comparable to soy sauce. This distinctive taste is reflected in the British company's marketing slogan: "Love it or hate it." It is similar to the Australian Vegemite and Swiss Cenovis." wikipedia definition of marmite


• Oh my. See what I mean about their tastes and my lack of adoption thereof?



• Thanks for inspiration Marmsie. You were a muse for a day even if never before or again.

Smeagol Wants You To Know

If You

Give a man a fish you feed him for a day, if you slap him in the face with it he'll be less likely to come back around and bother you next time

Mondays Missives

• It seems the more benign the commenter or blog writer the more vicious the comments will be directed at them.



• Yay I got my office back!



• Well, sort of the baby as been sick so when I get up with him that's where we go and that's the only place the big kids can watch movies and use the internet.



• Crap, it's worse than before.



• I wish I had an office.



• My oldest borrowed my laptop last night and this morning there was still a usb cable hanging off it- he must have pulled some of my music for his mp3 player.



• That's cool.



• Showed some of my pictures from The War to someone the other day: simply horrific I can say now but, I wonder most what it made her think about me personally.



• I'm pretty sure nothing can change a person like war or prison but, I believe the consensus is the change can be positive or negative and that depends on the individual.



• Laws and policies based on fear and misunderstanding really bother me and one example that comes to mind is the use of anabolic steroids. The words alone conjure images of roid rage, exploding hearts and damaged livers. The truth is millions of people in the US alone have used them without becoming violent. It is unclear how associative heart damage is to steroid use, there are ways to overcome the potential anyway and liver damage in users is always associated with oral use of extremely high doses. Also, most evidence against there use is anecdotal- no scientific studies (especially when first criminalised in the early nineties). During that time even the DEA and FDA were reluctant to pile on and testified against there criminalization.



• My thinking was first challenged on that subject by guys I knew who were using them when I was working out- smart people who never murdered anybody, their hearts never exploded and heir livers never fell out in the shower. Also, there are two doctors local to me who I know will tell you off the record how to use them if you know them and ask.



• Another bothersome aspect to this subject: when I worked out I got big quick- 18.5 inch biceps and as I recall 44 inch chest (Arnolds biceps were 22 inches for comparison) people would pull me aside and be really concerned I was using steriods and would hurt myself. Good grief.

Inspiring Easter Quote

All work and no play will make you a basket case.

thanks Lil Girl

Final Easter Missives For 2009

• The baby just fed me some M&Ms he had been carrying around in his little hand for ahem- a while. There was no saying no.
• Mmmmm- melty and salty from baby sweat.
• My 18 m0nth old nephew got nearly all the money eggs I made- 20-30 dollars.
• Bandit.
• They were bummed- no real candy just fruit thingies and little toys.
• I tried.
• Don't know if it's awesomely commendable that a lot of people will never darken a house of worships door except at Christmas and/or Easter or deplorable.
• My patient from last night died while I was discussing her case with my relief- at the bedside. Never had that happen before.
• An Easter that family will never forget.
• Christs death, burial and resurrection, some or all are often denied by people for various reasons but, a thought I always found interesting and compelling: if it were any other historic subject and the veracity of the story were questioned, the preponderance of evidence would have silenced any doubt.
• A lot of things can be overcome with faith or at least hope but, it's sad to see a person lose both and the thought of same in myself makes me fearful.
• I don't blame God. I don't blame Jesus.
• I hereby apologize for all the damage done.

Some Things Just Make Me Think "It's Going To Be OK"

"[sigh] We worked har-red in the garden today. The children helped me completely weed, prune and obliterate no-longer-desirables from the huge front beds. As we worked, we talked about Good Friday, Christ dying upon Golgotha, how the crown of thorns must've hurt, and how long the day must have been for Him. If you're a gardener, you know there were many parallels to our work....On Sunday, we will plant the new green life into our garden. The Littlest One announced, "When we see our new plants growing, we'll think about how Jesus rose from the dead!" I'm glad. It was a meaningful day. " from AnObiters blog incidental remarkings, thanks girl.

Creature Cavalcade

As promised pics of the snake captured on my latest wildlife expedition. We weren't really quite sure: was it a corn snake or a copperhead? As both the assistant baby and I are alive after several bites I'll go out on a limb and say confidence is high it's a corn snake. Note the carefully cultivated habitat including the broken riding toy my neighbor gave my daughter (thanks bud at least it could have matched the one I have up on blocks in my drive.) Please do not try this at home- except for the degree, training, government and professional recognition and general common sense, I'm basically a professional wildlife scientist. disclaimer: no animals were harmed in the making of this picture (unless you count me- why is my hand still numb?) and in fact ms snake here was saved from the ravages of the mower and released into proper habitat.

Dream Weaver Missives

• Last night was a night of, I mean for dreams. I'm so worn out, they went on all night- crazy.


• My most vivid wartime dreams? Oddly, although I've read very little about the period the most striking are set in WWI. Sometimes very real, detailed and terrifying. Also, oddly satisfying because I seem to interact with the soldiers and help them- they look at me like someone finally understands.


• I dream alot about FT. Wolters in Mineral Wells TX. I don't know why, always have. It was a place of good times, growth and great friendships but, the same could be said for FT. Hood TX and I prepared for my war there and spent much more time there.


• Didn't have dreams of falling when I was a kid much- I would dream of jumping over something and gravity loses its control over me and my body would shoot straight up and I'd watching the world get smaller, then pass through the clouds then feeling cold and my chest tightening as I go into subspace...


• When I dream of FT Wolters there's often an odd mix of WWII era equipment, uniforms, vernacular and practices coupled with same of modern era. There is always a mix of people I've actually served with in the past and historical figures. The dreams always seem very long and detailed and I'll even resume them if I wake up temporarily. We seem to be preparing for a world war.


• Audy Murphy did his basic training there and he would cross my mind often as we practiced patrols and set up camp near Engineer Lake which I would have first heard about in his autobiography.


• I never have dreams about my marriage.


• Rarely have dreams about my children but, when I do they are very sweet and satisfying.


• Still have dreams about showing up to class in my underwear!


• Good grief


• Worse though? I dream I show up for a college class on the day of finals and no one had told me to prepare. I break out into a sweat and feel like I can't breathe... I wake up thrashing and screaming.


• Sometimes I dream I'm on a motorcycle and everything is tinted in that dreamlike, soft sparkly look you see on well, dream sequences. They go on forever and I can smell the flowers, fresh air and oddly just a whiff of exhaust and leather from my jacket as I slow down for curves. Sometimes I'm watching myself sometimes it's first person. I can look around as much as I want and never wad the bike up in a fence. I can even look down and marvel at how my boot looks as the pavement rushes by under it and see it's reflection in the crankcase chrome. When I see myself from an external perspective I look so happy I nearly glow.


• I think my brain provides that one for me when I really deserve/need it- a treat.

Cavalcade Of Creatures

um, you might want to not click on image to enlarge.
If you've been following this little blob for the past few decades you'll know I'm an animal lover- specifically wildlife and have spent a good deal of of my time in my young life endeavoring to learn more about our friends of the woodland realm. I've brought you pics of snakes, toads and terrapins saved from the ravages of the lawnmower and baby chicks dealt a harsh blow by gravity. Sadly, all did not end well for Bambi as he negotiated the highways and byways of our fruited plain. Although I must say I don't know who was the goofiest: the guy who cut the head off a 40 lb. deer or the sobbing homeless man who said,"Can you please call animal control or the police or somebody? A black pickup hit her and a Red Tuareg stopped and cut her head off. It just happened about 30 minutes ago."

Fridays Dispatch - The Early Edition

If you have half a heart you'll save me from this tiny terror. Look at me- the indignity. Oh, the doganity!
(my translation) I lived in Labrador for a few years therefore, I'm quite fluent.

• Me and the baby slept out under the stars last night. It was nice until the wind kicked up to about 40 mph. He kicked me for the 50th time. The security light kicked on about 80 times. And the coyotes kicked in howling for about the 13th time.


• I'm beat. I drug both of us in about 4 or 5 AM. He didn't want to come.


• Mowed part of the yard yesterday. Felt very satisfying.


• Talk to me about it about mid July.


• Will have pics up soon but, caught a corn snake near the trash can. Very pretty- she just shed.


• How do I know it was a girl? Something in the way she looked at me I guess.


• Turned it loose at the back where I let it get scruffy just for our friends of the woodland realm.


• Showed it to my daughter she said,"Eeew I hate spiders."


• Huh?
• There has recently been a guy killed by a train in Decatur. I hadn't spoke to him in a long time but, we go way back (went?). Every Saturday we played basketball at the old gym on Cliff? Street and every Sunday we played football on the DISD field. Flag or touch? Um, no- tackle. Injuries you ask? Let me see, a broken ankle, nose, collarbone and finger are all I remember guys receiving. Lacerations and scrapes never slowed us- we thought you wore shirts to have something to wipe the blood away from your face. I also remember there was a guy who had played some college ball and was then an assistant coach of some type. It sounds cool and it was to have him on your team but, he got carried away and tried to push us around and run the show- kind of taking the joy out of our simple pastime.
• Jimmy Johnson knocked that guy smooth out one afternoon.

A Quote From Wiseguys 1987-1990

Charles Shagrass: You're McPike?



Frank McPike: Most of the time. I was Batman in the third grade, but that seems to be in the past.

Wednesdays Digressions

• Although I might not become a fan I watched Chicago Hope the hospital drama of the nineties for the first time in my life last night- it was very good.



• I think it's a bit odd maybe how people who have or will likely never have no personal stake in the capital punishment debate get really worked up insisting they are for it and I'm afraid I've never heard a well developed argument for the willy nilly use we see of it today.


• I'm against it except could be convinced of its necessity for the death of a police officer and treason.


• The death of the police officer in Bridgeport has brought out the best in people all over the state and country even.


• Don't get too excited when someone says something tacky in a comments section about his death or service- that's what they are looking for and I doubt many of them really mean what they say anyway.


• I worked 12 straight 12 hour days on a single case recently before she expired. "Tough old bird" as a member of her family said, She'll be the end of us all." I said to 2 family members committed to being by her side to the end.


• We lived on coffee, sweet tea, DR Pepper and fast food. She just slogged along without a bite to eat or hardly a drop to drink.


• Tough old bird.


• A fair gauge as a nurse of your patient care is how well the families want to take care care of you.


• I always misspell gauge.


• Another thought on the officer who was murdered in BP: in the past I knew both a guy named Steve York and Randy White so it really was a heart stopper when I first read the news. One is dead though and the other would be way too old to have been SGT. White.

Steven Wrightism

"I got up one morning and couldn't find my socks, so I called Information. She said, "Hello, Information." I said, "I can't find my socks." She said, "They're behind the couch." And they were! "

Interpersonal Missive

I was talking to a girl I met recently about foods we like when I said,"I could eat cheese filled cheese sticks dipped in cheese sauce and sprinkled with another kind of cheese." she finished my sentence (as random and weird as it was).

I saw little red cartoon hearts popping up all around her and my stomach felt funny.

Mondays Missives

• I was in my twenties before I ate KFC, watched The Wizard Of Oz or fell in love.



• There are very few foods I cannot stand but, celery is way up toward the top of the list.



• There was a girl who was hired as a temp. where I worked who lived in a government apartment in the ghetto. She was nice, honest and a hard worker but, limited I thought in her world view in that everything she knew about society seemed to come from television and her mother and grandmother who had lived in the same apartments their entire lives. I remember giving her a ride home so she would not have to ride the bus or worse- walk home. The instruction she gave as I left her have always stuck with me: "Don't stop for anything on your way out, not even stop signs and don't look at anybody and somebody tries to make you stop- they ain't up to no good- run over them."



• I could not believe how much she had to pay for the dump she was in after she got a job. I found her a house in a suburban town where she paid cheaper rent and her kids got to go to a decent school.



• Getting the motorcycle fever again- this can't lead to anything good.



• While the world is big enough for all of us and I like all kinds of bikes and respect the effort that goes into the different types of customs- you don't want to get me started on the Harley V Metric debate.

Mondays Missives

• I've ridden both an elephant and camel. It was hard to stay up on the camels hump and I kept sliding down its neck which got on the camels nerves and he would turn and bellow trying to reach me with its head. I was terrified and screamed,"It's trying to bite me!" to my dad. He laughed until he was in tears saying,"That thing isn't going to bite you" and made me stay on it until he got tired of it.




• He was a lot of fun that way.




• He was a plumber and would let me work the pipe snake sometimes to break up clogged pipes while he was visiting in the customers house. Based on my age when he died my educated guess would be I was about ten years old when that would happen.




• He did the plumbing for the Waggoner Mansion in Decatur and ticked me off thoroughly by not taking me when he went. He said it was, "wet and musty like being in a cellar"




• I usually demand even adult nieces and nephews call me uncle.




• Had the best dry rubbed ribs ever at Chilis today and I lived for over 2 years in Tennessee.




• Things that surprise me in the world we live in today: Americans that think the postal service is taxpayer funded. In Africa albinos live in terror of having there limbs cut off for there magical properties.


• I took the above picture of that boat near lake Habbaniyah in Iraq. I made me think of how you can't tell if anything over there is new or ancient- everything is varying shades of brown and technologies have changed little over centuries.

One Militant Pooch

Wednesdays Digressions

• An acquaintance told me once told me he and his dad would use propane in their car air conditioners after freon became unavailable. He explained very well and rationally how the compressor works and why the propane was a good substitute for the freon. All I could think of while he was speaking was, "The next time I hear from you it will be on the pages of The Darwin Awards.





• My spell checker is acting weird again, on difficult words it hi lights them and offers alternatives although the word will be spelled correctly.





• Zman so studiously flips through pages of books and magazines and so thoroughly enjoys disassembling movie and cd cases while scattering there contents from one end of the house to the other- I love seeing those things.




• The Finnish school shooting several months ago brought out a couple of interesting facts: Yemen is the second ranked nation for private citzen gun ownership Finland third and Finland has the highest murder rate of any European nation but, not normally by firearms- knives and other weapons.




• After the tax hike during the Clinton administration took effect I was working a job that required working 8 overtime hours on Saturdays. After taxes I made 12 dollars for that day. That is insane.