Monday's Missives

A joke is to say as you float the Brazos, Around this next bend is a place where you can get a haircut and a shave. OK, so maybe you would have to be there and regardless- I didn't say it was a funny joke.

• At work voicemails often are stored as saved when I have not listened to my messages or even touched the phone. It will do this when my email inbox to which the voicemail is tied is not nearly full and when there is only the one  message in question saved and no others. Also, my phone rings- I can hear it coming from my phone- right in front of me but an incoming call does not appear on the screen and if I pick up no one will be there. Good luck trying to convince anybody of all that weirdness when I miss an important call or fail to return an important voicemail.
• My dividend from REI is worth over 100 bucks.

  

  Somebody at work has someone in her family that believes in a all that essential oils nonsense. Consequently I ended up with some for my back. Did it help? No don't be ridiculous- but it was nice of her. I won't say what the contents made me think of when I first saw it.
• Today (12/18/2015) was the office Xmas party. I would have rather taken a beating. 

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  As a subtle form of rebellion I sometimes wear this t shirt under my scrubs at work.

  
  

  

  When I feel tired and/or beat down I sometimes wear these underwear. Yes, I have power panties- don't all the ladies?

• It seems as though my most recent attempt at a relationship is over. Of course the relatively expensive Xmas gift I ordered her online is on the way as I write this and gifts for both myself and my children are under the tree- at her place.
• A bad supervisor story: Once, after a patient left my office I hosed everything down with some air freshener. As I sprayed some in the door frame said supervisor (who was literally sneaking up to try and bust me goofing off) suddenly appeared in front of me. Needless to say the supervisor took a full face blast of industrial strength freshness. I felt awful and told my nursing buddies about it in what was I suppose a more or less confessional act?  During the telling and retellings 100% of the time  there was laughter and I was literally applauded.
• One hundred percent.
• When I put myself in that supervisor's shoes if nothing else I think, I would hate to know anybody would ever think or feel that way about me.

  

  Weird: the female grackle in the foreground chased a bunch of other birds away from another female. She then picked up  a piece of bread and gave it to the second.

  
  

  

  Here, she chases another group of birds away from a water puddle to allow the other bird to get a drink. I have never seen behavior like that before and would have thought a person telling of seeing it happen ridiculously anthropomorphic.

Monday's Missives

Piece of plastic found in my Panda Express teriyaki chicken, Mmmm... plastic-ie.

There is a lot going there for a sticker I found on a banana. It looks vaguely comminist. I don't trust it.

My patients love me.

• Recently through an odd, and tortuous route I was reminded of an old girlfriend. She is a very gifted salesperson. A component to the story is I was reminded of a  product she marketed by seeing part of a dumb unrelated infomercial and using that as a basis for a little online stalking got back in touch with her by Email.
• She was glad to hear from me ( she even mentioned recently trying to contact me by an old cel number) but isn't it a little weird you can randomly stalk people like that these days?
• A connected thought: I haven't had that cel number in years- how could it not have been taken by somebody else by now?
• Another connected thought: I hadn't spoken to that woman in a few years and hadn't even thought of her in a long time and within 2 weeks of thinking of her and attempting a contact she did the same for me?!

  

  Green mamba some idiot collector released or rough green snake?!

  
  

  

  Hmmmm...

  
  

  

  Still smiling 5 minutes after being bitten- probably rough green snake.

  
  
  
  
  

  

  Baby eagle found on the ground after a storm. I call him Popeye as apparently fire ants found him before I did and ate his eyeball. He keeps the rat and squirrel population down around my place.

• PS the above child was not bitten by the snake and that is not an eagle named Popeye who feasts on rats and squirrels around my house.
• I call him Murica!
• Normally I have my children on Wednesday nights but won't tonight as their mother and I traded some days around. I am simultaneously relieved I don't have them and ashamed for feeling that way.
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

  

  My kids are good fishers

  
  
  
  
• A black friendly acquaintance is aware that my children are pretty widely separated by age and has heard me during the course of conversations mention my adopted child's mother (without mentioning said child is adopted). Consequently, she has gotten it in her head that they all have different mothers and says things to me that start with, Do any of you baby mamas ever...?

  

  My children have played chess against John Malkovich

• As of this writing (09/09/2015) I recently was asked by a woman with whom I have been spending time (WWWIHBST) the number of sex partners I have  had throughout my young life. When I told her the number she reacted with shock that bordered on disgust. Some things are none of your business and if you don't get the answer you were looking for- why did you ask in the first place?

  

  Aside from being a bowling ball with glass baubles glued to it I don't know what this is but yeah- we live in  world where a bowling ball with glass baubles glued to it would absolutely be stolen from the Botanic Gardens in Fort Worth were it not chained and padlocked to the ground.

• So exactly who are, Richard Stoltzman, Bob Acri and Mr. Scruff anyway?

Just A Tuesday

If you don't believe in Bigfoot after seeing this, then you're blind and have definitely drunk too much of The Man's Kool Aid.

The chaparral or roadrunner is one of my favorite birds. A member of the cuckoo family they are predators that kill mice, snakes and lizards and then present them to their girlfriends to show how manly they are.

Zac and a princess play in the mud at Scarborough Faire.

• Medal Of Honor Cat
• Recently I read an article about guys who have lied about military service. They sometimes do this to defraud the government for benefits and sometimes to troll for babes and of course, sometimes it is for both reasons. One guy had a particularly good looking, well adorned uniform on and wasn't out of shape and did not have a goatee etc. He looked at ease in that uniform. I thought, Huh, no wonder he pulled that off for as long as he did. Until  I scrolled down and saw him in a park type setting wearing a boonie hat with the chin strap on! It is weird the things we take note of I suppose but man, there is no way a real vet would have done that- literally Not. In. A. Million. Years.
• There was a story title on a web site I glanced at earlier for an article about a movie star (I think she is anyway) undergoing a root canal. Oh the humanity! Good grief.
• I'm drinking a mix of cranberry and pomegranate juice- with another juice from concentrate. That is what the label says. It is probably just liquidy dregs left over from whatever fruit products they intended to make their real money on by dejuicing.
• I have no idea who Jody Arias is or what she is accused of doing but you cannot turn on any true crime show that they're not talking about her and there is a new headline on every news browser I use every day about her.
• It is hard these days to find any kind of caliber of rounds even nominally associated with a tactical type rifle or pistol.
• I very often misspell these as theses.
• When you hear of a murder-suicide tragedy involving 3 members of the military you can pretty well bet 1 will be female and 2 male. 

Monday's Missives

That is a long way down, isn't it dad? Yes, it is. Please be careful I said with my heart in my throat when I turned to see him looking into that yawning chasm of death instead of walking right behind me like I thought he was.

Life In The Balance

Hey, want a nice bottle of urine some arrogant rock climber left behind?

Amtrac drive sprocket

Guy being towed was having a bad day but was good humored about it

Gama Goat. I have driven untold miles in various examples of this weird old utility vehicle.  It was a 6 wheel drive and would float with a swim kit mounted. You can mount an infinite number trailers to each other making it look like a giant centipede. It had a 3 cylinder Cummins? diesel mounted right behind the driver that was loud as thunder. It would literally make you want to vomit to drive one for a couple of hours at highway speed- with  hearing protectors on. It will be on my short list for my dream shopping spree when my ship comes in.

When I put something made of meat and tube shaped in my mouth called Lil Chub... well, lets just assume that will never happen.

The rare and elusive Canada goose

Wall of legends of Mineral Wells State Park

Shadows

I imagined this elder gentleman helping the Hispanic man rig his fishing gear up as being somebody who without any malice whatsoever would pronounce Mexican as Messican.

I asked the concession operator what his number one seller was in this after hours bait machine. Butterfinger bars was his surprise answer. I correctly guessed number 2 as being Mtn Dew. He said the machine cost 8 thousand dollars. 

Her name was Dixie according to the calls of the people she abandoned with glee to come explore near us. Another light colored Lab was named Cracker. They were comical and smart - kinda in the job description of Labs I suppose.

This says I'm right here

Ancient Indian pottery shard

• The madness that is Afghanistan
• I like Walmart, good prices,quality merchandise and local assability." From a comments section on Walmart. "Assability"? Huh?!
• A couple of days ago I saw woman driving erratically and 5 mph under the speed limit in the passing lane. As I and the other 10 people she had stacked up behind her for miles passed her she looked up, took a look around and with a grin on her face looked back down to her phone and resumed texting. That same afternoon I saw a guy sharpening his pocket knife while driving and talking on a Bluetooth headset.
• Tomorrows planned trip to Sharkarosa Wildlife Ranch may be postponed due to thunderstorms.
• I had that very rare headache yesterday. It caused me to be nauseated and light sensitive. Even more rare for me- it forced me to leave work early.
• Barry mentioned once being known for having quick reflexes. On the same day I had the same observation scheduled to post on myself. When I saw his I took mine down so I wouldn't look like a copycat. That is a weird coincidence though for such a random thought isn't it? Anyway, yes I'm known for the same thing by people I'm around. I'll catch papers in mid air that somebody drops or a coffee cup a waitress drops etc. A few days ago a nurse missed the counter with her coffee cup as she tried to place it on the counter I was standing near. Reflexively, my foot went out catching the cup in midair, then in almost the same motion my foot went down to ease it to the floor. My nursing buddy said,"How did you do that? That isn't right- nobody should know how to do that." It's just another one of my superpowers.
• All my dreams were just a jumble of randomocity last night.
• Relationship pro tip: If your significant other wants some space be the second person in the history of the world to give it to them. Don't try to take control of the situation and find out whats going on or try to get physical to let them know what they're missing or whatever- let them go.
• It seems ignorant at least and maybe slightly racist for TV shows to subtitle a persons dialogue when they speak perfect English but with an accent that may be strong to Western ears.