Monday, September 12, 2016

Monday's Missives

Piece of plastic found in my Panda Express teriyaki chicken, Mmmm... plastic-ie.

There is a lot going there for a sticker I found on a banana. It looks vaguely comminist. I don't trust it.

My patients love me.
  • Recently through an odd, and tortuous route I was reminded of an old girlfriend. She is a very gifted salesperson. A component to the story is I was reminded of a  product she marketed by seeing part of a dumb unrelated infomercial and using that as a basis for a little online stalking got back in touch with her by Email.
  • She was glad to hear from me ( she even mentioned recently trying to contact me by an old cel number) but isn't it a little weird you can randomly stalk people like that these days?
  • A connected thought: I haven't had that cel number in years- how could it not have been taken by somebody else by now?
  • Another connected thought: I hadn't spoken to that woman in a few years and hadn't even thought of her in a long time and within 2 weeks of thinking of her and attempting a contact she did the same for me?!
    Green mamba some idiot collector released or rough green snake?!


    Still smiling 5 minutes after being bitten- probably rough green snake.

    Baby eagle found on the ground after a storm. I call him Popeye as apparently fire ants found him before I did and ate his eyeball. He keeps the rat and squirrel population down around my place.
  • PS the above child was not bitten by the snake and that is not an eagle named Popeye who feasts on rats and squirrels around my house.
  • I call him Murica!
  • Normally I have my children on Wednesday nights but won't tonight as their mother and I traded some days around. I am simultaneously relieved I don't have them and ashamed for feeling that way.

    My kids are good fishers

  • A black friendly acquaintance is aware that my children are pretty widely separated by age and has heard me during the course of conversations mention my adopted child's mother (without mentioning said child is adopted). Consequently, she has gotten it in her head that they all have different mothers and says things to me that start with, Do any of you baby mamas ever...?
    My children have played chess against John Malkovich
  • As of this writing (09/09/2015) I recently was asked by a woman with whom I have been spending time (WWWIHBST) the number of sex partners I have  had throughout my young life. When I told her the number she reacted with shock that bordered on disgust. Some things are none of your business and if you don't get the answer you were looking for- why did you ask in the first place?
    Aside from being a bowling ball with glass baubles glued to it I don't know what this is but yeah- we live in  world where a bowling ball with glass baubles glued to it would absolutely be stolen from the Botanic Gardens in Fort Worth were it not chained and padlocked to the ground.
  • So exactly who are, Richard Stoltzman, Bob Acri and Mr. Scruff anyway?

1 comment:

RPM said...

You should fashion him an eye patch. Pirate Eagle.