Saturday, June 24, 2017

                      EVA on the ISS ( at 1420 on 06/24/2017 at least).

Friday, June 23, 2017

A pack of feral mountain bikes rest in the shade after a kill.

Thursday, June 22, 2017

Smoked meatloaf wrapped in bacon with chopped bacon and mozzarella cheese inside

I'm sorry- you will have to excuse me. Sniff- I am getting a little emotional right now and can't talk anymore about this.


Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Wednesday's Digressions

God, what a screwed up world we have created when you have to put up a sign like this on a kids soccer field.

  • A lady on television just said something about the vow of poverty she had taken. That is how you church it up when you have decided- this is it, this is as good as it gets. 
  • Except when I am home- I never drink water that doesn't have lemon in it.
  • Commercials for home care givers always seem to have a young black woman taking care of a little old white lady. It is never the other way around.
    Zac is fascinated with the idea of eating muscadine grapes and has been watching for them to ripen. 
  • I have been assaulted by 3 different exes.
  • One actually tried to murder me. Like how you ask? Well, she tried to stab me in the head with a pair of scissors. She almost got me. I turned in time to see the scissors coming down. 
  • What did I do to deserve that you ask? Nothing- but nice presumption, you sexist pig.
  • Don't British people just call it a scissor? If they do- it makes sense.
    The wily and elusive Red Snapper in its natural habitat.
  • A family of 5 people just came into my Asian place. They smell like dirty sweat, stale greasy food, feet, urine and cats.
  • Madness.
  • An old friendly acquaintance was a babe back in her day. Once she got older she developed a bit of a mom body (although still fine) and then at some point she packed on another say- 20 pounds on top of that. She looked sturdy and kinda burly. She then went through some periods of rapid weight loss and gain. She would go from linebacker to back to pretty fine over the course of a few months and I saw this happen multiple times.
  • My point to that last point? There may not be one but oddly- I did not see her as pretty fine when slimmed down any longer. I saw somebody with a stealth Ernest Borgnine body just dying to pop out- at any moment. 
  • Even more odd- I found  it difficult to trust her.
    In case you were wondering what the inside of a dillers shell looks like.
  • Jim Varney tried to auto fill in that fourth to the last point after the word sturdy and for the life of me I cannot imagine why.

Monday, June 19, 2017

Monday's Missives

He has a brontasaurus riding in a trailer with a longhorn steer and a triceratops in the bed of his truck- your argument is invalid.

  • This past month flew by.
  • Someone will correct me and say that is a diplodicus and not a brontasaurus as I always get dinosaurs confused now that I have gotten old.
  • Zac just (today is 5/27/2015) asked me some questions about the war over breakfast.
  • Kinda surreal.
  • Most interesting question was, What was your favorite part about Iraq-if there was one?
    Me: is today going to be a good day?
    Universe: Uhmmmm- No!
  • Guy in the kitchen at Wildberrys is talking loud, fast and long!
  • I know a couple of people who
  • After a break of only few hours I come back here just as puzzled as you, as to where I was going with that last point.
  • Coming back a few days later I remember now, plain as day... 
  • No wait- I got nothing.
    Somebody left this in the break room. Multiple people stopped in mid stride as they walked by and did a double take- thinking it was a bottle of booze. 
  • When I was a boy we had family in Wichita Falls, Holiday, Iowa Park and Burk Burnet. On the way home from seeing them we would pass a quonset hut that was in private hands. It intrigued me as I knew it's military origins only and could not comprehend one being privately owned. I thought the owner must secretly be a soldier of some type.
  • I saw it once later- years ago but do not recall where it was located. It had been painted but was the same place.
  • Although I suppose it is a gimme- here is my favorite Pennywise song. What is yours?

Friday, June 16, 2017

Why

does it seem if a woman is nothing too special and is a redhead she seems dog ugly but, if she is considered anything OK and above she seems totally hot? I've heard guys say things to this effect all my life and we don't look at any other hair color this way (not even blonds).

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

el chupacabra's Life Pro Tip #1203


If you're in a relationship and the other person gets physical with you when he or she is angry you can stay if you want but bear in mind it probably won't be the last time and you should know that the person is at least capable of killing you and/or using other means to destroy you; essentially you can never trust them.

Monday, June 12, 2017


Monday's Missives

One of these are not like the others.

  • When I was a kid my brother was a Decatur volunteer firefighter. Through him I heard a story about a guy we always saw driving an old Caprice or Impala around all the time. It was I think brown in color and was outfitted with whip antennae. He discovered and then reported a couple of fires. This was applauded (I recall money being pooled for a set of tires). The warm fuzziness did not last long though as the number of fires mounted- fires that were always oddly in proportion to his proximity...
  • I have always wondered about that guy through the years.  The only other detail I seem to recall is his CB was first taken away with the idea being if he could not report the fires-  he would not start them. The fires continued. He merely drove somewhere to report them by phone ( I oddly specifically recall him starting one and reporting it from M&M  Food Mart). Subsequently, the car was then taken away from him. If alive, he would be at least into his late 70s and very likely into his 80s.
  • Know that story? I have asked around. People know the story but they thought it a common enough tale they knew they could be getting facts mixed up. As in, it could have even been somewhere else they were thinking of entirely, or my story did not match theirs, so they are unsure whose recall is faulty- mine or theirs etc.
  • Multiple people said to the effect of, You know- that sounds real familiar but maybe it happened somewhere else and we just heard about it?!
  • If you get mosquito or chigger bites etc. try soaking a paper towel in glass cleaner containing ammonia and place that on the area.
  • For some reason (and I am not complaining) I never get bitten by chiggers any more although I spend hours a week in the outdoors traipsing around. I honestly wonder if there are fewer of them around while again- not complaining or inviting kharma to assail me with a new strain of giant flesh eating chiggers.
  • My spellcheck did not like chiggers and autocorrected to chargers.
    What kind of monster eats extra crunchy peanut butter?
  • As an old girlfriend would get ready for the day I would play music for us based on requests she would make and new music I had found I thought she would like. At some point I would always have to straighten her hair for her with a flat iron. Her hair was pretty and soft and she put streaks of pink, blue and purple throughout. As we would hug goodbye she would get me to squeeze her to pop her back before she walked out. It was nice. It was nice to be nice in those ways.
  • A good, simple and perfect memory and good memories are all that will keep us going some day.
  • Honestly- I cannot overstate what those simple times mean to me to recall.
    Found this guy upside down and done- he was about to croak I think. Weird thing? I watched the scene from Blade Runner where Leon gets asked about the tortoise in the desert the same morning I found him.

    He will have crazy story to tell at the TVFW hall.

Saturday, June 10, 2017

This Evening (06/10/2016)


a girl I know has said she was going to come by but then later said she was going to hang out with friends at a bar. Now she is still coming by- just later.

She thinks she is gonna get likkered up and come by for a booty call.

Friday, June 9, 2017

Thursday, June 8, 2017

Elementary School Flashback


When I was in first grade there was a special ed. kid named Darwood who was severely hydro cephalic or what they called back then waterbrained. His hydrocephaly was so severe he had trouble holding his head up. I used to talk to him when we would be out for recess. He had no friends- even the teachers had little to do with him and he would sit near the school building and play in the dirt while we were on the playground. I remember how he would lay his head over his shoulder a certain way or hold it up with his hand when he was tired of holding his head up. I felt for him and would talk to him. It isn't an overstatement at all to say I was the closest thing to a friend he had in this world. One day he was lining crayons up on the paved area in front of the classes. I asked him why, It makes them melty.  Why? was again my response.  It makes them taste better and easier to eat.  He offered me a yellow one. I instead chose red. It tasted waxy, salty and dirty.
He disappeared after a holiday break and when I asked the teacher where he was- she said, Never you mind child

I am sure he died. I hope I made his journey in this world more tolerable.


My Last Email Exchange

Me: Do you want to just cancel vacation plans?
She: Might as well with the way things are going.
Me: Maybe it is for the best
She: I guess
Me: Ok
She: OK then I'll cancel
Me: K

So, lets listen to some Black Rebel Motorcycle Club- Beat Teh Devil's Tattoo which features some of my favorite lyrics such as: "You have forsaken all the love you have taken..." and get our heads around this development.

Monday, June 5, 2017

Monday's Missives

Turtle eggs. They were some sweet, sweet midnight snacks for a predator.





Catfishocalypse Honestly, these remains were everywhere- dozens of them. Superpredator  involvement or they were from a fish stocking activity and they were too dumb to survive? I have never see anything like it. 

Never could get the sunrise this morning to look on the phone as beautiful as it did to my eyes and I must have tried a dozen times with different distances, angles and compositions. A related thought: the aesthetic component to the sunrise itself did not last long. Within 2 minutes it was just boring ole, mean Texas sun beating down on us.
I like this flower picture although it was a only a one handed snap just to  remind me to look it up later. The way it always goes it seems.

  • A long time ago near Alvord? There was a country music festival. I actually prowled around the left over rotten, remaining structures years after the fact. Somebody told me Conway Twitty played there or he was supposed to play and the whole thing never got off the ground? My guess is it happened or did not happen in the 1970s?! Odd detail I remember: the field had nice, huge pecan trees around it-otherwise I have no idea where it was.
  • Anybody know what I am talking about?
  • Something I have done that you have not- ride a 4 wheeler from Briar to Alvord.
  • It was a surreal experience. We gassed up multiple times over the course of the day including once at the Derrick truck stop on 287.
  • It might be a worthwhile endeavor to be birdwatcher.
  • Also it would be an excuse to buy myself a cool set of binos.

Saturday, June 3, 2017

Bought new tires at Discount Tire this morning. Nothing like new underwear and new tires. 


Friday, June 2, 2017

Friday's Digressions

I have OMDD- old man drawer disease 

  • The Greenville car dealership shootout was crazy! All 3 actors dead?! That doesn't happen. It makes me wonder about pass-throughs. That is what in the old West days they would have called going out in a blaze of glory. 
  • Well Bon Jovi said it - but you know what I mean.



  • Has a road rage incident ever resulted in a person killing an unrecognized  family member in another vehicle?
  • Traffic is going to continue to get worse in and around Fort Worth and Dallas as the years go by.
  • If it is raining when I leave work I go kill time in my restaurant. I don't bother to leave for an hour or more. My theory has faults but there is essentially a 150% chance there will be wreck on the  stretch of road I take home. If I am not on the road- I'm safe.
  • My restaurant? That looks stupid.
  • They tore down my old chicken place. It was just in a dump of a convenient store but holy smokes- they made great chicken!
    Ugliest. Color. Ever.

Thursday, June 1, 2017

Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Wednesday's Digressions

  • At work yesterday I had two nursing buddies rolling on the floor in laughter- at a fart joke. 
    What 14 buck got me at Bakers Ribs the last time I went. The emphasis is on last time in case you were wondering. Phweeew it was bad. I ate there in the past at least 4 times a month and did so for years.
  • People often think of hospitals and health care facilities in general as being super clean- sterile even. You should know the opposite is true- bacteria and virus are by nature highly concentrated there. Hospitals are where you go to get sick- if not already.
  • Yesterday I had a black and Bleu burger with bacon at Shaws on Magnolia. Have them put the Bleu cheese on the side when you try it though.
  • John Oliver on dialysis in the US.
  • Paul's on Hemphill has changed their fries to a smaller, crispier McDonald'sesque type and they are fantastic. Previously their fries were not terrible but they could be a little doughie in the middle.
  • Slow clap starting for you now Paul. Bravo my friend bravo...
    Sir, are you aware you are a deer?
     Bwhaaat...?! Me?!
     This may be a picture of a deer but it and my little joke are a better picture of our hive mind created or at least affirmed by the Internet. I have never seen it but there is a 100% chance somebody has created a meme based on that picture using a similar caption. If they wanted to be snotty they could sue me I guess but there is a zero percent chance I have ever seen the meme.

Tuesday, May 30, 2017

I found this at The Chive under, Weird Thrift Shop Finds

I think the word they were looking for is amazing.

My buck fifty score from the pawn shop. It along with Night at the Roxbury, Big Lebowski and Kingpin are some of the funniest movies ever made (I think we all can safely agree on the correctness of that assessment). They have Blu rays for 3 buck there now so I suppose this may be among the last DVDs I ever buy.

Monday, May 29, 2017

Monday's Missives

So many questions and lessons. Was he failed by society, family, genetics or just plain old Lady Luck? All of the above? Also- he has a cel phone, money, a sleeping bag and smokes and got expert free medical care for the ankle he broke staggering off a curb or getting struck by a car or whatever.  Even his choice of place to crash is telling. I would not want to sleep there and yes he would be safer in a house somewhere but he is on balance pretty safe there. Even our homeless are rich by world standards.

  • "That's huge, and no one's talking about it. (To be fair, it's hard scaring people about Zika for ratings if you just told them even the worst diseases are conquerable.)" From a Cracked article about Sri Lanka being declared malaria free. The point was- this is a big deal and you should have read about it somewhere besides there  ( or by extension, here I suppose). You could also ask, What if there was a minor uptick in drug resistant malaria in Sri Lanka? Well- you would not reading about it here or on Cracked- the headlines of every news browser would be screaming about it.
  • The Police song Every Breath You Take has been playing in a loop for hours in my brain. 
  • Agony.
    Soy sauce- because adding a sprinkle of salt to your egg roll would be... weird?
  • A server at one of my Asian places just graduated culinary school. I remember when she first came to 'Merica a few years ago. I tip her more than I should- because I should.
  • I keep a couple of bottles of DEET containing bug repellent at home and even one in the truck but never seem to have it when I really need it.
  • You cannot look for a repellent without finding one touted as a safer alternative to DEET. There is no alternative to it safer or otherwise. It is highly effective and safe.
  • There is nothing wrong with DEET. We should be using more- not less. 
    Especially me apparently Omigosh. I'm gonna get the Zika for realz.
  • Weird: people who are only alive because of vaccines, pasteurization and antibiotics are opposed to vaccines, pasteurization and antibiotics...
  • Humans are so weird.
  • I am glad I am from Mars. 

Sunday, May 28, 2017

Move along folks, nothing to see here- just a guy with a donkey cart making camp in front of Home Depot in Weatherford AMERICA!
How cool is that?! I wanted to go talk to them but before I could get to them a couple beat me there.
I feel like the donkey is named Pepe'.