Wednesday's Digressions

• The Stooges and Iggy Pop Search And Destroy. An interesting video using clips from FMJ and Apocalypse Now.
• If you hear a woman outline the reasons she is madly in love of a guy she'll almost always say something like, He's sweet, good looking, thoughtful, smart and funny.
• Great, men- all we have to do is be George Clooney.
• Something that will only happen to me: the other day I left my key in my cap while I swam and sunned. When I was leaving the pool I threw my cap on my head. The key fell out of it and stuck to my back between my shoulder blades and started burning my skin. It had lay in direct 104 degree sun for 2 hours on a black table so there is no telling how hot it was. I jumped around and tried to get it off. I nearly dislocated my shoulders while flailing my arms trying to reach it. "Get it off of me!" I said to the girl I was with while turning my back to her. She assumed it was a wasp stinging me or bug biting me etc. and backed away without looking at it.
• It wasn't as fun as it sounds.
• The above post was started June 29 2011.
• Wow.
• I have lived a lifetime since then and it also literally seems like yesterday

  

  From my Craigslist ad for the EDGEFEST tickets. It was pretty funny. I should have linked to it or copied it.  I ended it by writing, "Cakes the cat says the tickets are legit and a good deal and you know cats don't lie. Send me your phone number."

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Monday's Missives

• The world is too small: an acquaintance was recently relating to me a story about a custody battle for her grandchild and during our conversation she mentioned her daughter in laws first name and an unusually named grandchild. I knew instantly the drug house she was referring to getting her grandchildren removed from was an old nursing buddy's from my years ago long term care nursing days.
• Another example: I met a very gorgeous woman a while back and tried every trick in the book to get her to go out with me. She would say yes, then no then maybe. Finally I gave up. I've seen her twice since, each time with two different, scabby looking ugly dudes. Each time in a weird circumstance. One time she was smashed, sitting in a lounge chair on the patio of a bar/grill I was having dinner at- she lit up when she saw me and tried speaking to me, but was incomprehensible.
• She must have been too good for me.
• All of the Terminator movies had their moments, but I guess T2 was the best.
• Kevinator- one of my old military nic names. Don't tell anybody- I don't like it.
• Un Chien Andelou- what I'm watching. It is on Netflix if you're interested but you probably won't like it. It is an old silent movie.  Simone Mareuil one of the stars, killed herself by setting herself on fire. Her costar Pierre Batcheff also killed himself.
• Papa Roach Forever a nice acoustic version.
• If I had some money and wanted a lot more I would invest in 3D printing tech for buildings. It will use some form of concrete with a plastic binder. A computer will control how the mix is sprayed and buildings will get printed out in place in a single, continuous pour. It will revolutionize construction like nothing else I can think of. 
• One word: 3D printing technology for building construction.
• Well, OK that is 6 words but you get my point.
  

EDGEFEST 2013 After Action Report

• I sold tickets to a scalper after trying to give them to nearly everybody I know.
• The lineup: Phoenix, Bush, Airbone Toxic Event, Fitz And The Tantrums, Gaslight Anthem, 21 Pilots, Atlas Genius, Capital Cities,  Youngblood Hawke, Kitten and IAMDYNAMITE
• It was great to hear so many bands I had wanted to see literally since I first heard them and in the case of Deftones and Bush that would have been 20 years ago.
• Parking was 20 bucks.
• There weren't as many freaks there as I would guessed- a few extreme piercings and one impressive punk Mohawk was about it.
• I don't drink, which is a good thing as beer was 9 bucks a can.
• A girl burned my arm with a cigarette. She was mortified- it really bothered her. She apologized again as we were leaving a merch line. Don't sweat it- try to find a new habit though- it will be better for both of us! 
• Gaslight Anthem was way good. I don't think I had heard them before. They were a little punk on some songs.
• She: What do you think they (Bush) will start with? I hope they close with Glycerine. Me: Well, if they don't open with Machinehead- they're wrong. I was right and she got her wish.
• There was too much time between bands. The temporary flooring was white and could fry your corneas with it's reflective glare. The wristband area for us VIPs could have been better managed to improve ingress and egress. I guess these are the only things I'll be adding to my list of  The Earths Serious Flaws.
• Also, I was for a time stuck behind Mr. Backpack- you know the guy, the one who is somehow oblivious to the 30 pound he is carrying and continually backs into you. What does he carry in there? He was drinking beers and water from the vendor. He didn't have camera gear in there. But even worse was when he decided to move behind me. His breath smelled like a possum had died in it four days prior.
• All things considered the restrooms were immaculate.
• I had to process a semen sample for the lab at work the other day to rule out testicular tuberculosis. I'm sorry, "immaculate" made me think of ejaculate. Ahem, let's get back on track shall we?
• The smell of weed was everywhere. It was everywhere for the entire 8 hours or whatever I was there. It was everywhere and it is illegal- not ill advised- it is unlawful and it was everywhere. It was everywhere and EDGEFEST wasn't some kind of 420 fest in Humboldt County. How can something that pervasive and accessible be illegal? It literally makes no sense.
• There were quite a few people messed up out of their minds drunk. They may have no recall of a great show today when they wake up (assuming they do).
• Gavin Rossdale came running down the center aisle working the crowd while singing. I put my hand out to high five him but he missed and my hand ran across his sweaty left pectoral. Yep ladies- I have touched the nipple of Bush's lead singer and Gwen Stefani's main man and you have not.
• A mid 30s woman was just nearly ready to throw down with a 16 year old girl over a spilled beer when said 16 year old came crashing down on the fuddy duddy while crowd surfing. Can you imagine an assault charge against a teenager and your defense is, She spilled my beer!
• Deftones were literally awful which is a shame since I have wanted to see them for 25+ years. I guess "awful" is a cruel overstatement. They just weren't as great as I thought they would be and I have listened to everything they have recorded. 
• Paramore rocked the house- holy smokes they were loud and good.
• BUSH covered Come Together and it was awesome. When they would sing the line, Come together right now over me. I would say Come together right now over Chelsea (friend-girls name). A girl standing near us turned to me and said, I heard that- that was cool. She then turned to FG pointed at me, high fived her and said, Way to go!
• I am being treated with affection and respect in a healthy way in a nice/safe environment and all that is being expected of me is to reciprocate- I have never experienced that before.
• I am unbelievably tired. Good night world wherever you are. I love you in spite of yourself. I'll put pics up tomorrow morning (04282013).

Gearing up

for EDGE Fest 2013! Two Red Bulls, 3 ibuprofen and a chopped sammie with jalapenos from Baker's and I ought to be good to go. See you there. I have two extra tickets- too bad I don't know you, I would totally square you away.

Object lesson #643: Don't throw your foot up on the coffee table while friend-girl is painting her nails and dare her to paint yours...

“Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option”

Thursday's Thoughts

• A weird dream the other night had me fighting like a gladiator in a Hunger Games type setting. We lived in hutches that were like chicken coops. The setting evolved into better digs that were like log cabins. It continued to evolve to the point everybody wore white and the surroundings were like 60s science fiction view of the future-  all white and stainless steel and glass and sterile and boring. It was much more fun when we were living like animals, stabbing each other with sticks, being chased by mutant animals and having sex in the mud.
• I remember places called news stands where you could buy newspapers from anywhere and magazines for every subject you could imagine.
• It was soooo windy today. How windy was it? It was too windy to fly a kite. I mean literally- we shredded 3 of them. For a long time I've been aware windy days put me in a bad mood. It has gotten worse over the past couple of years- to the point I can't mask it. I get snappy, sullen and don't care who is around to enjoy my self absorbed tirade.
• Really, it is a privilege to see me pitch a hissy fit over nothing.
• When a news story is about a complex subject and one expert believes something is caused by a certain activity and another one thinks the same thing is caused by something else and the third that trots out says, No- it is another thing altogether causing the process I am almost always sure it is a combination of the things they're ready to argue to the death over.
• Panda Express is great.
• A good way to tell if a woman is any fun is offer to teach her how to use chop sticks in a Chinese restaurant if she has never tried them. If she is too embarrassed to try- too worried about what others think, never see her again.
• Another interpersonal pro tip: if you go to a trade show or convention or any setting that has free swag, snag some for people you work or otherwise spend time with. They will sense you were thinking of them and that is most often worth more than things you can buy.
• Above I spelled restaurant correctly the first (or one of the few) time(s) in my life.
• The worm may have turned for me.
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

  

  View from the creek of Enchanted Rock.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
• A true Texas original: Roky Erickson A Cold Night For Alligators. Read his bio and you'll understand why I refer to him as an original...

Something About Me

• Something I get kind of often: Kevin, you seem so brave- unnaturally so, sort of super hero-ish brave. Does anything frighten you? Now, let's keep this between me, you and these four walls OK? There's only one thing and only one thing in this whole wide world that frightens me and that Is. A. Roller. Coaster. I kid you not. I have fainted dead away on both the Shockwave and the Texas Giant and come to with a girl in a panic slapping my face and saying,"Kevin, Kevin- are you OK?"
• I wish I were kidding.
• Really- as in I'd rather patrol Fallujahs main street- in 2004.
• Naked.
• With I hate Allah written in Arabic with a Sharpie on my back.

Wednesday's Digressions

Watching a wedding at Scarborough  

The owner of this skunk skin purse  grabbed it and drew it close to her when the bird handler  mentioned the horned owl he was holding specialized in eating skunks.

One of the people in the procession gave Zac this coin.

Falconer gives a young spectator some wisdom

• Lincoln is on pause.
• Days ago in a dream I told friend-girl the melted glass I was eating was fried glass. When I awoke  I was nauseated for hours, my stomach hurt and could smell a burned house odor in the background all day. 
• The change machines at the laundromat take 20 dollar bills I recently learned. Based on the assumption they took only 1s and 5s I have been breaking 20s for months on the way to the laundromat. Laundromat pro tip: Do your laundry in the early evening if you do it on Sundays as you'll hardly ever beat the Mexican ladies to the 25 cent machines in the AM and in the early afternoon the oilfield workers are all there after sleeping off whatever they had been defiling themselves with all weekend.
• Food is criminally expensive these days. No wonder people eat so unhealthily by using dollar menus etc. I make a decent enough living and try to shop smart and all that but it is discouraging when it costs 56 bucks to take 4 bags out of the grocery store and there isn't a single steak in any of said bags.
• Friday 04122013 I saw a guy on 30 during rush hour stop at one the choke points and pick up a busted extension ladder. I am all for recycling and I know he would have made quite a bit off it but holy  frijoles Batman- how many lives did he risk doing that?
• Liam Lynch Dolphin Song

TIOBB

That. Is. One. Big. Bug.

Just A Tuesday

If you don't believe in Bigfoot after seeing this, then you're blind and have definitely drunk too much of The Man's Kool Aid.

The chaparral or roadrunner is one of my favorite birds. A member of the cuckoo family they are predators that kill mice, snakes and lizards and then present them to their girlfriends to show how manly they are.

Zac and a princess play in the mud at Scarborough Faire.

• Medal Of Honor Cat
• Recently I read an article about guys who have lied about military service. They sometimes do this to defraud the government for benefits and sometimes to troll for babes and of course, sometimes it is for both reasons. One guy had a particularly good looking, well adorned uniform on and wasn't out of shape and did not have a goatee etc. He looked at ease in that uniform. I thought, Huh, no wonder he pulled that off for as long as he did. Until  I scrolled down and saw him in a park type setting wearing a boonie hat with the chin strap on! It is weird the things we take note of I suppose but man, there is no way a real vet would have done that- literally Not. In. A. Million. Years.
• There was a story title on a web site I glanced at earlier for an article about a movie star (I think she is anyway) undergoing a root canal. Oh the humanity! Good grief.
• I'm drinking a mix of cranberry and pomegranate juice- with another juice from concentrate. That is what the label says. It is probably just liquidy dregs left over from whatever fruit products they intended to make their real money on by dejuicing.
• I have no idea who Jody Arias is or what she is accused of doing but you cannot turn on any true crime show that they're not talking about her and there is a new headline on every news browser I use every day about her.
• It is hard these days to find any kind of caliber of rounds even nominally associated with a tactical type rifle or pistol.
• I very often misspell these as theses.
• When you hear of a murder-suicide tragedy involving 3 members of the military you can pretty well bet 1 will be female and 2 male. 

Jurassic Post- In 3D!

• We saw JP in 3D today. It was very cool considering as I assume, it was not originally filmed for 3D. There wasn't stuff flying around over the audience like in the previews. The extra depth was nice and interesting though. 
• 3D could be habit forming.
• An ex was in one of the commercials played during the previews.
• The guides who conducted the jeep tours for the scientists wore pink polos and belts with khakis. It was obvious to me none of them had worn their caps before that day of filming and in fact were not cap wearers- a common mistake in movies requiring wearing of hats or caps with a uniform.
• Poos is offered as alternative to polos by my spell checker.
• There are holes in the story but by and large it is easy to suspend my disbelief.
• No small problem: the animals were from the cretaceous period.
• When the lady scientist and the game warden were gearing up to reset the breakers she took a radio and not a shotgun. He took a shotgun and not a radio. The game warden would not have allowed that in a million years. He would have forced her to take a gun even if she didn't want to and if he didn't take a radio, he would have taken two.
• They spent a gazillion dollars building that park, were motivated by safety, the game warden had repeatedly reinforced to them it needed to be done but remotely operated door locks were not added to the tour cars?!
• I don't like people not acting like people would in the situations the movie places them in. Plot holes- even ones considered minor by others bother me. Jurassic Park's problems are minor. All in all JP3D is a must see- don't miss it!
  
  

Monday's Missives

• At a friends house I could plainly hear her upstairs neighbors come into their apartment causing me to inadvertently look up and follow the sound of their footsteps. "Any minute now they'll have their bowling ball dropping contest. They'll drop them there and there" she said pointing  to 2 points about 3 feet apart on her ceiling. Sure enough there was two bump-thumps on her ceiling followed by the same a few feet away. "See I told you. Now, in a minute you'll hear it even louder over there. she said pointing toward a corner. I don't know what it is, but it happens every night." After a few seconds sure enough, there was a louder bang-thump, bang thump toward the wall she pointed at followed again by the same a few seconds later in the same area.
• It took a minute to figure it out, but it was their boots- they sat down in recliners separated by a couple of feet (probably a table between them), took their boots off dropping them to the floor. They then threw them toward the corner.
• Robot Chicken was way better when they used real action figures they bought off EBAY predominately as opposed to purpose built models for their skits.
• Pickled pigs feet will never be on my menu.
• Sprinkle a little fresh ground black pepper, sea salt, chili powder and a little vinegar on any red meat product you're about to cook (or forgo the salt and vinegar and use Worchestershire sauce)- how to look like a genius behind a grill or in front of a stove or oven.
• I would literally be shocked if all the recent attention regarding the slaughter of horses for human consumption hasn't blown up demand for it out of simple curiosity like no advertising blitz could ever accomplish.
• For the first time in my life I am craving BBQ chicken.
• As long as we don't harbor any illusions about it's efficacy in deterring crime and understand that is purely an act of vengeance and not justice, I have no problem at all with the death penalty.