Friday, August 6, 2010

Friday's Late Dispatch- Loneliness A Brief Treatise Involving Intensely Scientific Observations And Generally All The Answers To All The Questions










  • Is there anything worse than loneliness? It's even worse than heartache I'm sure. Heartache as a certain ebb and flow and times even a certain blunt numbness that eases the pain, but loneliness? It wraps itself around you festering- sometimes making it impossible to do the things that may otherwise make you feel better.



  • My heart really goes out to lonely folks.



  • I've never looked at them the same after experiencing it firsthand for the first time. Want to know lonely? Visit with that neighbor you have whose name you may not even know who is 80 something and lost her spouse of 50+ years two years ago.



  • Really, it will be good for both of you.



  • Is it worse for men when it truly happens?



  • Why when I ask that question aloud do I nearly get my head ripped off by angry women?



  • I think on balance though it may be due to better support systems and continuous obligations women must throw themselves into which will ease the pain until time can work its magic. Women almost always have to be tougher- men can wallow when not engaged in their occupation- women seldom have time.



  • When I was young I jetted off out of state and went to college and spent over a year on my own and when even younger went halfway around the world in the military often travelling out by myself from my posts. It was viewed as a strength which was commented on often- "How can you be alone so much and seem so happy? I would die!" At the time, although reasonably cognisant of how devastating loneliness could be and a compassionate person when I saw it, I was at the heart of the issue- clueless and smugly basked in the adulation I received based on my so called strength.



  • Mostly, I was lucky I've since learned. There was a natural resilience due to my youthfulness, a generally outgoing personality and curiosity (all of which helped more than I could have known at the time) and in times of need (yes, even when I didn't know I needed them) people close to me were truly interested in my welfare.
  • I hope to be there for others and be thankful for those interested enough in my welfare to be remembered long after I knew I needed them.

2 comments:

YM said...

I see your point, women often do have better support systems because they more readily confide in someone, but I don't think men have the market cornered on how bad loneliness can be. I also agree, lonely is worse than heartbroken.

There's always pecan pie at Whistle Hill Cafe. (or whatever it's called)

an Donalbane said...

Are You Lonely Tonight? - Presley, Only the Lonely - Orbison, Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band - Beatles, Hey There Lonely Girl - Holman, One (Is the Loneliest Number) - Night, Lonely Boy - Gold, Loners - Murphey, Owner of a Lonely Heart - Yes, Lonely is the Night - Squier, When You're Only Lonely - Souther, Lonely Days, Lonely Nights - Whitesnake, Lonely Ol' Night - Mellencamp...AND MORE.

You know, this could be, like, a whole genre of music, huh?