Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Vacation After Action Report

From the Buckhorn Hall. 

CC- one in a string of Alamo cats.

Getting ahead of myself- a sunset from the Basin at Big Bend.

  • I don't exactly know where to start relating our recent adventures and so I assume I'll bounce around as my synapses get sparked and I recall things- bear with me. Dreams have come true- wow what a wild past 7 days.
  • We rented a car. Although it wasn't the Dodge Charger I requested, they tell me the new Chevy Impala is good for 125 MPH on those wide open desert roads you find between San Antonio and Marathon and they're just as smooth as at 25 MPH. I wouldn't know- that is just what I hear. It also had a Bose sound system which came in handy to receive the one Mexican AM station I received for the bulk of the trip.
  • San Antonio was our first stop. We stayed in a four star hotel after getting a sweet deal. Predictably some rich guy was bawling out the little girl clerk because there was a hair on the floor of his room or whatever. The more she tried to placate him the worse he got- bully. People should ask themselves, Would I be addressing this person the same if he had a tattoo of BORN TO KILL on his forehead and outweighed me by a hundred pounds instead of a 90 pound woman or a child? 
  • The AC in the room was unbelievably cold. The only way it could have been any better would have been if it had blown ice chunks out at me.
  • I could have held my breath and gotten to the Riverwalk from the front of the hotel.
  • There is a Motel 6 just blocks from the action- driving blocks maybe though. I wasn't expecting to see it and was getting way from the Plaza area so I wasn't really paying attention but it might be a cheaper option.
  • If you stay on Houston or go to the Alamo first regardless of where you stay there is a Walgreens 2 blocks away and a Big Apple Bagel place for very good sammies and coffee.
  • We ate at Hard Rock- very good. There were music videos playing on what for me was the main screen. Some mongoloid of a fan got them to switch it to a game. Whew! Yaaah! Alright. Way to go baby! were the things he screamed while actively ignoring his hot  and I perceived sweet girlfriend.
  • We ate at Texas Land And Cattle Company- nasty. It was literally awful but hey, it was also expensive. I had one of their signature dishes when they were not incredibly busy. There was no excuse. It was as if they were trying to make it bad.
  • May the Alamo never stop stirring my soul. I am glad FG experienced it with me on a Sunday morning. I am glad history is starting to correct itself on that story.

    You pay the zoo people a dollar and you get to feed a cup of sugar water to these birds. I don't know what they're called- diabetabirds?

    It was well over 100 degrees that day and this girl was wearing this ridiculous cap because she saw some tard of a celebrity she worshiped wear one at inappropriate times and thought it looked cool. 

    Yes, he is real.

    It was 103 degrees with about 1000% humidity and I saw multiple women feeding their children who thought they needed to cover their babies up- so very sad. What is wrong with us? What is wrong with us when we have to ask whether it is right or wrong for a mother to feed her baby? It is ignorance like this that cause prudish moralists to lose so much political ground- guaranteeing they lose on the things that actually matter. 

    When I saw these I recalled San Antonio is far enough South for banana trees to make but will they ripen and be edible? The world will never know- I forgot to ask.

    A lot of horny chairs in one place.

    A lot of Mexican people were taking picture with tablet computers.

    Parachute plants that were unfortunate enough to live where herons thought it would be cool to establish a rookery.

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