Thursday's Thoughts

"Kevin!" Somebody who didn't like me was being nice (and that is nice). 

• Today (01/09/2015) as I drove through a drive-through of a Whataburger (pronounced Water- burger in the parlance of my homeland)  the girl in the window tried to flirt with me a bit. She took note of my state of dress (short sleeves in 30 degree weather) and said, Where is your jacket or sweater? Aren't you cold? I replied, Nah, I'm good. I'm hot blooded. She handed me my change and then said, Oh, you're not much of a morning person? (although it was fairly late in the afternoon). She realized what she had said and went red all over and tried to backtrack. I said, Its all good- here this is for you and gave her a tip. She was gorgeous- literally beautiful. I don't know her story but could make some guesses. She was covered in tattoos. She seemed smart, funny and personable but not as any of them those as she had probably been in the past. Something derailed her. She didn't belong there but maybe kind of did... 

  

  Everybody in the house got sick this past winter. It was a challenge- but I pulled everybody through somehow. Half the time we were in Benadryl induced comas the other half  we were wandering aimlessly at 2 in the morning tweeked out on pseudephedrine.

  
  

  

  So a foreign born patient asks, Do you like fresh coconut? You answer- Of course! She reaches into her purse with her dirty hand and pulls this out and hands it to you. What do you do? You make a big deal of thanking her for thinking of you, let her see you place it on a paper towel on your desk and tell her you'll eat it on break of course.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
• Here, have some Sex Pistols
• Yesterday (01/13/2015) I initial dosed a patient on some medications. Approximately 30 minutes later she said, Kevin I don't feel right. My face is burning. I feel weird. and then a minute later she said, Hey,  I'm starting to itch. Me being the smartest guy in the room and learning in nursing school that it isn't normal nor advantageous to have a burning face, feel weird nor itch, I quickly whipped up a referral to the emergency department and sent her to the hospital.
• Although that particular case was cut and dried- a lot of what I do consists of knowing when to make my problems other people's problems.
• It is 02/25/2015 and snowing like mad. The big thing now is talk of the 50 Shades of Gray movie. I won't watch it as it looks incredibly boring and dumb- even worse than the horrifically bad book. Soon though, all the news stories will be about people damaging themselves and presenting to emergency departments acting out the dumb things they saw in that dumb movie. Also, watch for the reports centered around kids and their antics after they watch it.
• Think of the kids!

At Fort Richardson. Which of the 3 do you like?

If the air temp is cool enough to at least not be considered hot and your sodas are too warm, place them in a grocery sack of water in the shade. It will probably have a little leak or two (although you don't want it to leak like a sieve) if it doesn't- poke a couple of pin holes in it. Fill it a time or two and over a period of 30 minutes or an hour and your Dublin Dr. Peppers will be if not frosty- much more refreshing as the water running off and evaporating pulls some of the heat away. Someday you should ask me about how in my old National Guard unit we would expend a fire extinguisher over our beverages in the field to cool them.

Wednesday's Digressions

My idea of a perfect hot rod. The paint color, wheels, tint and ride stance - it is perfect in my book.  Drop a lightly cammed, otherwise stock-ish big block in it with a stout tranny and give me a pocketful of cash for gas and I'd be good to go. Eeeew- I said, "stout tranny."

• The Syrian Civil War a 5 minute primer.
• Like nailing jelly to kittens- my newest expression I use every chance I get when I need to express an impossibility.
• I heard some newer Steven Wright the other day. It was terrible. He got a rousing ovation when some of his previous genius tried to shine through. It was purely polite applause- the audience was embarrassed for him and felt uncomfortable.
• The lovely Lady O reminded me of the turkey drop episode on WKRP In Cincinnati titled Turkeys Away. Interestingly, although the details have been lost in time, ( Was  it a shopping mall in Atlanta or was it a church in Dallas? Were they dropped from a truck or yes, a helicopter? ) it supposedly really happened in real life.

  

  Interesting factoid-  I jacked this from Lady O. If it is true I had no idea.

• On a Saturday in 2060- my Death Clock day of death which at 96 years of age sounds very ambitious and highly unlikely.
• The oldest known joke goes back 2000 years to the Sumerians, "Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman did not fart in her husband's lap."
• Potty humor never goes out of style as it has apparently- always been in style.

  

  Found hanging from my office door handle with an Xmas card. 

  
  

  

  An owl pellet. They regurgitate all non digestible matter into this pellet called fittingly an owl pellet so yeah, it is basically mouth poop.

• For some time I have had this idea of making a hammock out of nylon using climbing rope for suspension. I offhandedly mentioned this to a friend having no idea she works part time at Joann Fabrics, meaning an employee discount and access to coupons. She also likes to sew and has a decent machine. She wants to help make some of them (one for each of my children, FG and myself) and doesn't want any  money for the work. If I had to judge that situation from the outside, it obviously would look like I was fishing but honestly I had no idea she worked there on the weekends and some evenings. There is no way I'll let her do it for free but I look forward to seeing if my idea works. It will have a built in shelter and bug net and be cooler than anything you have ever seen in your whole life.

  

  An iconic scene from one of my favorite movies From Here To Eternity. Think of how many times you have seen this still used to prove or illustrate a hundred different things.