Everything I Know Part 1

• I've never met a white person named Washington.




• George Lopez although the most unfunny comedian in the world- is surprisingly easy to lip read.




• An old platoon sergeant flew medevac missions in Vietnam. He said 90 percent of all wounded they picked up were hit from the knees above- the take away being if in combat and you're somewhere at knee level or below when metal is flying around at high velocities you're probably going to be OK.




• When someone on hearing another person is a teacher says,"Well, you know what they say- those who can't do- teach." I'm always pretty sure they're retarded.




• I probably use the word retarded too much.




• The staggering number of people who believe: alien visitations and abductions and a conspiracy behind the JFK assassination are true and that these same people as jurists have (especially in my state) the power of life and death over other citizens chills my blood.




• To be considered for Senate or Congressional office people should have a law degree and a minor in economics wouldn't hurt.



• During Mark Twain's time Australia was referred to as Australasia and Hindu was spelled Hindoo.