Translating Womanspeak

Woman: You could do so much better than me.

Translation: I could do so much better than you.

Belated Monday's Missives

"My dogs are gay." I tell people. "No way" they say. Really, do you need more proof than this pose on their blankie?

OK, you asked for it, not me- and they take turns doing this all day long. They sleep in the guest bathroom and the things I hear them doing at night- shudder. Eeew.

• I feel for anyone legitimately damaged by defective Toyota vehicles however, this situation shows how irrational we can be- the last numbers I read on the recalls was something like 8 million vehicles. People assume they're some kind of death traps. 8 million vehicles, if there really was a real, widespread problem- think about it, we wouldn't have had to learn about it from the news- we all would know someone killed by the death traps. We wouldn't be able to get anywhere in our vehicles that are other than Toyota's- our cars would slide off the roads because of the blood that covered them.
• However, when it's all said and done Toyota will be out of hundreds of millions of dollars and will be lucky to stay afloat.
• Ben Folds does the music for Over The Hedge and it's great- very sweet, simple music.
• "I am Inigo Montoya- you killed my father. Prepare to die."
• I bet the movie The Princess Bride is studied in film schools as the perfect movie. It's nearly 30 years old now and 50 years from now people will still be discovering it and calling it a favorite. It never gets old to me and I love to share it with people.
• I'm getting old though: of 2 recent women who showed some interest in me the older was 53 and the youngun was 37.
• I don't know how this happened, but it's a tragedy of the highest order.