Wednesday's Digressions

                                                                        Carrying the laundry to the laundry room- Zac style.

• Every few years I'm reminded of a story that has always fascinated me- the bison of Catalina Island. In 1924 several were taken to the island 25 miles off the coast of California for a western movie shoot. After sadly not even getting their shot at the big time in the movie they were left behind. Being mammals they did what mammals do, so what do you do when there's too many for their own good?
• I had a best friend once who was morbidly obese- say, 500 pounds obese? When she would make a weight related statement regarding herself she would refer to herself as being heavy. It was the only time I gave any thought to her size but, it sounded ridiculous for her to use that expression. I don't know what I expected her to say, Ginormagantuan?
• I had a patients tongue in my mouth once.
• Holy guacamole'- assault and sexual abuse right? That's probably what would have happened if there had been a witness. In a patients room as I stood at the bedside holding a clipboard in one hand and a thermometer in the other the patient called me closer and then closer again. When I got close enough, her her arms shot up with the speed of a Ninja. She grabbed my head with both hands and pulled it down and as I called out something brave like help! our mouths banged together.
• And yes, she slipped some tongue in there.
• What would a court sworn eyewitness report seeing in those situations if they'd walked in at the moment of impact?
• You know as well as I- the families would have owned everything I had, there would have been jail time and my nursing license? Pfffftht- I would have been lucky if Goodwill let me sort merchandise.