Burning Man Festival- Texas Edition

My imbecility knows no bounds I'm occasionally reminded. I work nights so I rarely see daylight in general much less with time to get enough sun to tan so the other day when it was bright enough (although cloudy) and I felt well rested enough I decided to sit in the backyard and catch some rays. Being the genius I am I put some Skin So Soft on me to protect my delicate skin.


Well, I must have slept through whatever science class (refraction?) that would have taught me what a cloudy (but, bright) and cool day can do with the combination of oil on fair skin.


After about 30 min. I was impressed thinking I was noticeably darker. I went in after only 40 min. and was alarmed to see darker was actually redder when out of the suns glare.


I had to work that first night shivering with a severe headache, nauseated and with a temp. over 100 degrees- essentially radiation poisoning.


Presently, skin is falling off my upper body, head and nose in patches large enough for skin graft donation if in fact- I wasn't a burn victim myself.


Believe me, it isn't easy being retarded.